5/30/2005 8:59PM

Dear Friends:

If they ever tell you that I have committed suicide, or have died in an accident, or have simply just "disappeared," I don't want you to be content with that. Please, exhaust every possible resource at your disposal to ensure that I was not murdered. If you do determine that my death was a homocide, then I want retribution to be enacted on my behalf. I have typed up a list of instructions, as well as a list of contacts so that you may all band together. This packet has been deposited in a safe place, and will be distributed to you following my eventual demise. Keep in mind that, while it is to all of you that I am entrusting my post-mortal venegance, one of you may well be the killer. If that should come to pass, don't feel any remorse in turning upon your once-friends. They did kill me, after all, and as such they are not the people you thought they were.

Thank you,

Christopher B. Dino

5/27/2005 12:36AM

Do you remember that time I told you that Katie and I drove to my house once in the middle of the night? Well, while we were on the way back to Hampshire, we passed a speed trap on the highway at like, three in the morning or whatever - some ridiculous hour, and we were definately the only car on the road. This guy was just sitting in his cruise on the side of route 2 at three in the morning. I think that he probably didn't even care if anyone was speeding; he just wanted to work shit out. Like maybe earlier that day he came home to find his wife in bed with another man, and so he just left, and he'd been sitting there ever since. Just constantly locking and unlocking the clip to his service revolver, taking it out, looking at it, feeling the weight in his hands. Wondering about how many other people have ever felt like this; hoping that if he went through with it his wife would be sorry, but knowing that she wouldn't be.

I hope he decided to put it away.

5/24/2005 3:48PM

I'm back home. I don't wanna talk about it. Let's review a webcomic.

A Lesson Is Learned, But The Damage Is Irreversible is by far one of the most incredible comics I have ever read. Dark, sometimes even depressingly so, but always hilarious, this is a strip that keeps coming back and surprising me. David Hellman and Dale Beran draw and write like I wish I could draw and write. As of this writing, the most recent strip features Dave looking for a job, only to have his interviewer hang himself, come back to life, and hire Dave for sneaking out on the body. Previous strips have featured a gun whose bullets can only pierce the flesh of your one true love, an alcoholic rabbit who dotes on his ex-wife, and a dive into the transitive quality of memory and reality.

Sometimes even more involving than the strips themselves are the comments left by the creators. Dale in particular has a tendency to craft these elaborate little plots that make me wonder when he's going to write a book, or at least a collection of short stories. The Alcoholic Rabbit episode came on Valentine's Day, and features a particularly scathing little editorial on the nature of love.

The drawing style is also very noteworthy. Dave's comments tend to run less towards the fictional, and more towards the actual workings of the strip and his artistic style, so there's not too much I can say about it that he hasn't, however, I can tell you that the composition of the strip is part of what makes it so incredible. It is hardly ever linear, and there are hardly ever any definite "panels." Instead, everything seems to flow into everything else, and it is not uncommon for single elements to dominate a strip, with action occurring around one central image. This lends a sort of stream of consciousness to the strip, and as you read it, you tend to think the way you imagine the characters would; you experience what they're experiencing, to an extent.

There is a downside to the strip, though. Updates are sporadic, and months can go by without a new comic, though the wait is usually worth it.

I suggest going into the archives, starting at the first strip, and reading straight through. The first few comics are pretty generic, following your basic webcomic mold, but once they get to the fifth or the sixth - at least, that's where I place it - they really develop their characteristic style, and their characteristic style is one of the cooler things I have ever seen.

5/3/2005 3:53PM

So yeah, it's my little sister's birthday today. She's fifteen now. Jesus Christ, she can almost drive. That is so nuts. Happy birthday, Emily!

5/2/2005 8:44PM

Updates have been sparse, and will continue to be, as it is the end of the semester and papers are coming like a crazy person with a knife.

Tomorrow is my sister's birthday, and by a wacky coincidence, also the birthday of my friend Andrew's sister. Oh yeah, don't forget to click my advertisments. They're pretty much my only source of income.

©2005 Christopher Bee Dino & Totally Jawesome Industries